Dragonboat Tragedy
Recently the death of the 5 dragonboaters in Cambodia has realli struck a chord with me, partly also because one of the 16 who survived is a classmate of mine called AD.. (i'll just stop here, not fair to give his full name JIC). My classmate is realli passionate about the sport, and I remember how passionately he spoke a couple of modules ago when he was frustrated by the fact that other sports which had achieved less,were allowed to go to the SEA Games, cos they had important ppl behind them.
Anyhow, when I heard about the accident, I knew that he was involved, and unfortunately couldnt contact him, and only got relief a few days later, when I saw his face in the papers mourning the loss of his team mates.
But well the incident realli reminded me how fragile life is, and how 5 young bright lives could be extinguished by God just like that. There is a saying dat goes dat God often takes those he loves most early, wherelse he gives others more time on Earth so they can repent. Hmmmm, sometimes I realli think that line is true. I feel at times that I am unworthy of God's grace and love, and how, especially in recent times, He has turned the tide for me when all seemed lost. Sometimes I just feel dat I dont deserve it, but realli I just accept it now and am realli grateful for it. I hope to use His gifts wisely.
Hence, I hope AD will be ok, I dont think i will talk to him directly about the situation soon, but I do hope he will recover, and I hope that the team will grow stronger because of this. As i spoke to Mini just now, the smallest consolation we can get from this incident is the fact that they died doing something they loved, and for something they believed in, not because they were drink-driving or anything. I respect that and I hope they rest in peace.
My hearts go out to their families and loved ones.
Twice as bright but half as long, they burned.Out.
Updates
Lately have been trying to keep fit cos of the bloody OFI course dats coming up, I guess its a blessing in disguise to actually have something to work to, and running has been good, pace has been good, and my breathing is improving.
Sometimes I ask myself why I cant say the things that I wanna say, sometimes in the desire to protect people, you have gotta absorb everything in, which sux realli, but I think as an older, so claled more mature and experienced person (which I cant realli say I am), just gotta bear with it, but I wonder come the 29th if the truth will spill out, I dunno and I dont want it to, but there are just somethings which I cannot hold on to much longer. But can try I guess.
Other than dat, things have been fine, a bit stressed out from the very hard 1 1/2 months ahead, I would say its the most challenging in the academic field, with so many things to handle, I just hope I can pull through and maintain the correct standards.
Sometimes I also feel that im poking my nose where Im not suppose to, but its never cos of something bad? Am I being a control freak? Perhaps. But I promised myself that I wouldnt let you leave the team feeling like you could not use anything to apply later on in life, I just hope you will communicate yah, cos as much as I am suppose to, I dont like to be on the outside looking in.
Out.
Whenever I look back at this year.
Only one word sticks out in my mind.
LOSS.
Sometimes I realli wish it never happened at all, but we can we do, I guess its all part of life, and just gotta fight on.
I shouldnt have let it happen.
Out.
November Update
Its been a while since I last wrote, but nothing much has changed, as usual, Im always thinking about a lot of stuff with regards to VJSG, trying to help as many as I can, but sometimes its realli hard, cos you can only do so much, and there are just so many variables.
But I mean, me being me, I dont realli wanna give up lar, despite some discouraging words yesterday by Mr Tan, I told him that I will do it, no matter what, no matter what or how the circumstances are. The least I could do is just try my best. I think at times things can be realli bad and testing, but I will not give up, or give in cos I firmly belive that as long as I dont things will be ok and alright eventually (haha im telling this to myself more than anybody else).
Other than that coaching course has been tiring and testing, but I realli feel fulfilled and have been trying to learn as much as possible.
Ok the boys came already, till later.
