Looking for a light

its early in the morn and before it gets any busier this is the best time for me to blog in office....yesterday and today have been boring days, ntohing special for me.....beyond the fact that now im into my 4th day of not talking to uni, and the 3rd day ive not been talking to my parents....oh you havent heard? well u prob did but didnt think i would not talk to them...oh well this is old stubborn azrul for u...

I havent spoken to them for quite long, just the odd exchange of words...or word....frankly i cant be bothered lar...i think the whole situation is pretty crappy...im just tired of trying to be part of the family, so nowadays im just drifting in and out of the house, and im not telling my parents where im going too....this will prob make my mom even madder but it doesnt matter cos i just wanna prove to her that screaming at people will never solve the thing.....

so now here i am with all this new-found freedom, im gonna do what i please and im gonna make an effort to keep out of their way...finally on sunday, my mom's true colours came out, and i am nothing but disappointed that she does not take pride in me at all, and acknowledges that I am a failure....sometimes in life u always need someone to give u the value u need to carry yourself around, someone who will always be proud of u...now i noe my mom is not. right.

Today uni finally msged me, after four long days, but im yet to reply lar, at least she msged and took the initiative, i juts wanted to see how long it would take....man im acting like Jun now, this blows....oh well i will msg back at the soonest...i hope to see her soon....

For the past few days I have been walking around bedok HQ with a sense of emptiness....am realli feeling unfulfilled around here, i walk around and do my work, hoping that the day will end soon, life is realli meaningless nowadays and it pains me to go around just being an extra lar....oh well...sigh...i will just have to live with this for the coming nine months....beyond a shadow of a doubt, this past year and a half and the coming nine months will be the longest, and most useless, in my life. Could it get any worse?

well dats it for now, as it is im not realli in the mood for work right now also, but just whack lar.....right now i got bout 6 hours plus....think im gonna go rent some dvds to watch tonight.....right now all i can say is