Looking for a light

When you're close to tears remember...

Its been a long time since i blogged so here I go...


Maybe i shouldn't juxtapose these two words together, I mean hell is a lot more worse, but well office right now is hell for me. We have been realli busy the past week for the coming event, which btw people is the PAP party awards and conference on saturday and sunday. Well dat explains why I have to be in office at 3 am tomorrow. Sigh. But anyways, actually when I come to think of it, theres only one person realli irritating me in the office. My supervisor. Honestly, if I were to start on him, I'd never end, but let me just say for the record that he is a poor excuse for a man. i guess it realli sux when u hate someone so much but u cant do anything cos he will be giving u your grading at the end of the day. And its realli hard to walk around knowing that in seven months time you're gonna get a poor grading no matter how hard you work.

Its hard.

But well I was thinkin to myself yest as I was walking to mosque, about how my life will be ruined by this man I hate, and I felt realli down. So I just asked myself...

How will u bounce back?

Yes, Azrul how will you bounce back? From defeat and disappointment. How?

Good question.


Yesterdae, after the disappointments and frustrations at office, I went for night prayers. Then I stayed back for the sermon, which lasted past ten. Somehow after evrything that happened earlier, I just felt like I had to pray to God, and be amongst people who loved him, to feel at peace wif myself. And it worked. Its amazin realli considerin in the past praying wouldnt realli come to mind if i was pissed or somethin. How things change.

But anyways the congregation was in good voice, and it realli helps cos, well its something like cheering for your school, when the people around u are really enthu bout it, it will infect you as well, and make it a better cheer. Same thing for prayer.

Then the sermon began, and I was close to tearing, when the "imam"(head priest/father/what have u) started talking bout how ariel sharon refused to let arafat to be buried in his homeland should he pass away. And how muslims are turned away from seeing Masjidil Al-Aqsa, one of the holiest places in the Muslim world, which lies in Jerusalem. I guess Sharon has his reasons, but well I just pity all those innocent muslims who are denied the chance to see such a beautiful sight, cos of the acts of other irresponsible/disillusioned muslims.

Sometimes, I can't help but think dat the image of muslims have been scarred foreva, and no matter wat we do we cant rid of it. And with George W. Bush being back for 4 years, god knows what will happen to us.

I guess all we can do is to keep patient and to keep praying, and to present to non-muslims the better and the truest face of Islam.

Well, back to the sermon and all, it was all realli nice, and I was encouraged by the sight of fathers bringin their sons to listen to these sermons, I hope dat if someday I have a child, I will not fail him and raise him/her as how my dad has raised me, equiping him/her with the necessary tools in life.


Its now less than a week to hari raya, and preparations are pickin up. Hari Raya is a damn happy day lar, for me, and well the food is magnificent, its like every house u go to youre prob gonna get a full meal. And this year I hope to invite ppl over lar, if I have the time, and if my parents dont mind. Last year even Uni din come but its ok, i'm supposed to go to her place this year and officially "meet the parents", which is nerve-wreckin cos her mom is at times a little abrasive. But anyways one more week. Sometimes I wish ramadhan wouldn go away, but well I miss going for meals with friends.


Today I managed to free myself from the Ops, and I will be heading to Maju. Too bad I got Ops @ 3am though. Im lookin forward to Maju, coach has laid out his plan, and well I hope it goes well, its great cos the ppl around are also beginning to be more positive. Too bad Jerrard cant make it though. But well, the show goes on.

Hmm, dats all i would like to talk about, I do have a rather pertinent subject that I wish to talk about but I'll leave it to after Hari Raya. In the mean times no matter wat religion u are, I just wanna give my props to all those ppl who, I know exist in every religion, give and serve selflessly in the name of God. Only God knows the rewards that await them. Amin.

Out.

posted by Me @ 1:21 PM